catchy

♫ how would you like / to be eaten / by rats? ♫

just a little jingle I’m writing for my service where … where people get eaten by rats, where I get paid because people want to be eaten by rats, because the jingle was so catchy they were like “hey, maybe I want to be eaten by rats”

Haunted House (roll 1d6)

  1. Too Many Windows
  2. Ghost in the Garbage Disposal
  3. 1920s Party Still Going Full Swing But Oops, Also Evidence of an Ancient Murder
  4. Cotton Spiderwebs, Peeled Grapes in a Bowl
  5. Jump Scare Central, Check Yr Corners, Cover Yr Mirrors
  6. Smells Bad

look at us, not haunted by the threat of ancient evils unleashed

People from the next village over think they’re soooo cool ’cause their intramural basketball team usually takes nationals and also because they don’t have an ancient evil in their farmland, pinned in place with a slowly degrading rune-marked plinth. Sure, it keeps getting struck by lightning, the plinth, and yes, it’s been attacked by mad-eyed mask-wearing strangers with picks and axes, but you know… we have a nice cucumber festival. We have some nice things.

The Signal: EP176

The Signal: EP176 – Exactly 45 minutes of music as we kick off year 9 of this little curation project. We’ve got UK bass, Filipino/Canadian hip-hop, French garage rock, Spanish punk, and enough funk for several trunks.

Download by clicking on the link (or image) above. The file is available only for a limited time. If you’re interested in the tracklist, it’s in the mp3 itself, in the id3 tags.

I’ve cancelled my Spotify account, so I’m not making playlists over there anymore. Feel free to recreate ’em using the tracklist in the file, I guess.

a tiny god

Sweet the Observed. Adherents serve this tiny god when they stage a marriage proposal, or gawk at same. Sweet lives behind the eyes of the person aiming the Kiss Cam during a sporting event. Delivered flowers. Petaled paths. Documenting intimacy for public consumption.

a tiny god

Tickle Friend. Lives in the space between wiggling fingers and ribs. A faith that fills the gap between “I’m not touching you” and laughing at the idea of touch. Phantom ants when sitting in grass. Phantom ticks in the woods. Phantom spiders in bed.

witch tokens

Witch coins can be felt, but not seen, except under certain circumstances, so their valuation is often taken on trust and verified later. Yes, this leaves open the opportunity for fraud, but those who engage in fraudulent witch coin transactions— or are even accused credibly enough— can find themselves hounded out of markets and locked out of easy/profitable trade opportunities.

To view the denomination of a witch coin, one must:

  1. Submerge it in mare urine and peer through the murky fluid
  2. Let the coin be touched by reflected moonlight
  3. Leave the coin in the mouth of an old woman for a day, reading it on their tongue once night falls
  4. Hire a blind numismatist whose delicate fingers can trace the invisible etched value
  5. Spend it and then sell back what was bought, in a symbolic circular transaction, so the value glows briefly on second receipt
  6. Rattle it in a witch drum and count the bounces as it settles