Less-Than-Ideal Companions for a Child Who Has Fallen Into a Wonderland (1d10)

1) A hermit crab with a terrible sense of direction
2) A hunk of thistles tugged from the soil
3) One’s own homework, animated
4) Gary, who’s not your REAL dad
5) Chewing gum golem
6) Pope Pius IX
7) A talking “This Way To Exit Wonderland” signpost
8) The number 8
9) A collection of awful smells
10) Any rabid animal: dog, raccoon, bat, huffaloomph, airship spider, electric beffle, hoop sisters, etc.