spooky season

I don’t check my kids candy. I don’t check anything they eat. Had a guy holding a butterfly net tell me one of ’em ate a whole zoo, including the enclosures and the ticket stands. All the animals, gone down the gullet.

Said he was hoping I’d let him past the door, maybe he could at least scoop back an emu or something from the kid— hence the net— and I said “buddy, that’s between you and the emu.”