THERE’S ONE IN EVERY CULT

“So I says to him, I says: Gary, you gotta take this stuff more seriously! The daggers, they’ve got to be anointed in oil, Gary. The oil in the carved amphora by the door, I says. And get this, he goes: By the door? I’ve been using the oil in the shallow pool that holds the EYE BUGS where the bodies of the sacrificed are reduced to component parts, and I says: Gary, that’s not oil… those were PEOPLE!”

“Wow.”

“Anyway, so yeah, that’s why his dagger smells weird.”