FRAGMENT: Voting Fraud

WARNING: Robots who pass for humans are circumventing our voter ID laws by 3D printing their own IDs.

If someone asks for a ballot and produces their ID from their mouth very slowly while making whirring and beeping noises, please give them a provisional ballot to complete until we can determine whether or not they’re a robot who has taken the place of a registered voter human.

PLEASE NOTE: It is still legal for humans to keep their IDs in their mouths if they like, though you may ask them not to and remind them that mouths have germs. Please use appropriate gloves or germicides if you come in contact with a mouth ID. Your safety as a poll worker is paramount.