Category: Words Words Words

Hop on your steed and head out after the bank robber Bantam! Seek your own doom in the pursuit of fortune in this self-contained adventure!

Adulthood is realizing that the werewolves were out there every night, bones cracking as eldritch energies wrenched them from their human form, twisting them into something new and terrible… it’s just that it took a full moon to SEE them back then.

Now we have light bulbs.

man it’s only been 3 weeks and already I’m so nostalgic for when we’d all get together with no social distancing, dress me up in rags and straw, drag me through jagged cornfields and leave me out for the Summer Queen to devour after rising from her deep winter burrow, crushing my bones and blessing the harvest

1) Granny Pigrose’s Charcoal Sketches of Beaus
2) Prophecies of Sunken Cities (abridged, all city names removed)
3) Jerf’s Merjical Spallbuck
4) Frog Gods and Their Resale Value
5) Guestbook of the Ghuls
6) Card Tricks and Other Tricks (Latin edition, bound in blood and bone)

1) A golden goopbird’s pin feather
2) Intracranial coin purse
3) The Tongue Key
4) Bottle of elk bile labeled “98% pure”
5) Enok’s Skin Book of Skin Samples (unexpurgated)
6) Gem-eater’s bezoar (unripe)

1) Lem’s Knuckle Gin
2) 18 Snake Wine Soda
3) Bandit Spit
4) Empty Glass Rental (hourly rates discounted)
5) The Luckiest Gull (sparkling)
6) A bottle marked Poison but we just reuse bottles, don’t worry so much

text in image: a screenshot of a poll where the question posed is “how many clowns fit in car” and the available options are “many clown,” “cl01n,” “what is car,” and “all, somehow, how”

You guys can tell me: Do I come off as approachable? Please leave all responses in writing outside my den, weighted down with a smooth stone, and then back away while continuing to face my den so I don’t see your back, triggering a “pursuit” reflex.

Nothing worse than surrounding the guy who broke into your warehouse, but having social anxiety about when you should jump in to punch and kick them because you “don’t want to step on anyone else’s moment” and “there’s not technically a queue” so you’re just reading body language and hoping for the best, and in the meanwhile he’s beating everyone up 1-on-1 even though we have the numbers on our side.